goal.

so today i had my first meeting for mariners. this is the hostess for the marines and navy rotc on campus. all the girls seem so sweet and down to earth. im excited because we have a team for the relay for life coming up in april. i remember going to them ever year when living in wisconsin so im happy to do it again. 

after the meeting we all went to a bbq restaurant for a fundraiser. later i was waiting in the student center for a friend when these two people came up to me. the girl commented on my headband. i thought that was the end of it but then she invited me to a bible study they were having. i thought, why not? everyone there was so nice and they had a good vibe about them. we talked about how much time we spend taking showers, getting ready, brushing our teeth. i think it is funny since i use to spend over and hour getting ready in the morning. i would straighten and/or curl my hair. put on a layer of makeup (because i was so self-conscious from all my acne). i even went to the tanning bed almost EVERY day. it was awful. nowadays i send like ten minutes getting ready. i look like crap. but i dont care anymore. 

anyways so we were talking about how we care so much about our outer appearance but we dont care as much about our inner. most of us dont focus on whats going on in our hearts. or others. i know i dont care so much about my outer appearance anymore but i still need work on my inner. i know what i want though. its just making it happen. i wish that i was more accepting of others. there are times that i find myself judging others when i really only barely know them or what they are about. i wish i knew more about the bible. i want to be closer to God. i want to pray more. thank more. appreciate more. love more. 

starting tomorrow i am going to be a healthier person. end of excuses. i have been eating so unhealthy the past week or so. i feel awful. i am going to only eat raw fruits and veggies. cereal. water. no more starbucks. no more pizza. i am writing this in this blog so that i will stick to it! 

i also am going to start not cussing. i have the worst mouth. i cant help it. i feel awful after i saw it. i dont think it is attractive. and i need to stop no because one day i want to be a teacher and i cant have this awful habit. 

i am going to pray more. appreciate more. love more. live more. i am doing this for me. i need to stop giving into temptations. i know i can do this.  i have faith.