Friday, April 22, 2011

earth day. birthday.

yes. today is EARTH day plus my BIRTH day. that's right i am one year older. 19 to be exact. i anticipate my birthday all year round. i get so pumped. im making countdown calendars and thinking about what kind of cake i want. 
sadly i am always disappointed though. i unrealistically expecting so much out of the day. like everything going smoothly. people remembering and wishing me a good day. 

a lot of people dont really care about their birthday, which i can never understand. who wouldnt want to celebrate the day they came onto this earth and started living. its funny i just realized i can to this earth and started living on earth day. crazy. 

so yes this year i was planning on finally visiting my good friend in ttown who i have meaning to visit all year. then on the way i was going to visit my bestie back home and see my dad on the way back to school. then oh course everyone went home for the Easter holiday so nothing was going on in ttown and my lover back home was grounded. then i realized i really did not want to spend tons of money on gas and drive three hours on my bday for it not turning out so great. so i decide not to go. i was glad to know though that the friend here would be in town and i can spend my day with her before she moves back home. come to find out she is leaving friday morning for the whole weekend. cool.

wake up this morning. feeling a little gloomy. my bestie here comes in my room and asks to use my phone. doesnt even say happy birthday to me. nothing at all. out of all people i thought she would say something.

go to take a math test. my beautiful friend had brought me a pastry from starbucks and the sweetest card. i couldnt believe it. i was so happy. plus i got a few texts throughout the day from people wishing me happy birthday. even people i would never think would remember. makes my heart warm that they thought about me. i think in life that is all i really want. to be thought of. to be accepted. loved. cherished. 

things might have not turned out the way i planned. but i got to spend a great day with my mom and i realized how many people care enough to wish me a good day. and there is nothing better than that. i couldnt be more grateful for them.

Monday, April 4, 2011

storm.

oh how i love big thunderstorms
the whole sky lights up for a few moments
the rain sprinkles and taps upon my window
the wind whooshes and howls
the thunder pierces through me heart

thunderstorms always remind me of being a child
summer nights when heat lightning struck
and cracked through the sky
my uncle larry was over, we sat in lawn chairs
with the garage door wide open
the sky, our movie screen
counting the seconds the bullets lit up the sky 
to tell how far away they were from us

summer days  
all alone
rain pouring down
windows wide open
humidity in the air
still, calm


the rain makes most people sad, dreary, tired 
it is beautiful to me
like angels crying, the world is cleansed
i feel the droplet of water, falling on my skin 
 i stand, head tilted upward, arms outstretched
rejuvenating, majestic, spiritual, lovely